OTizzle

Great Pic

2011-12-19T21:37:00.001-08:00

Fantasy Logo, 2011

2011-08-22T14:15:00.001-07:00

Team Name:

The Nematotal Domitation.

Re: The Last Few Months

2010-02-01T23:11:00.001-08:00

Hi.

The past three months, really, have been a blur. November and December were a scheduling nightmare from a tutoring perspective, trying to balance the different holiday schedules of four independent schools, and to plan for the craziness that has been January.

The day after Christmas I took off for two weeks in New Zealand to be in the wedding of my good mate Luke Amundson. It was a great trip, with lots of friends and loved ones all around to celebrate a beautiful couple. New Zealand wasn't a bad place to get a tan, either! We had amazing, gracious hosts the entire time, and were able to see a pretty good chunk of the countryside.

So great a trip, however, has its costs; for the past three weeks I've been charging full speed ahead. Not only did I miss the first week of school, but I also missed a week of work, which I have been fighting with all my might to make up. Why? Because we project a certain number of tutoring sessions for each month, which we need to meet by the end of the month or bad things happen. Sooooooo... I've just completed one of the more hectic three-week periods in recent memory, cramming four weeks of insane scheduling into an already-straining schedule. My evenings, after working until 8 or 9pm (there were finals in mid-February) consisted in reading biochemistry and watching podcasted lectures.

Speaking of which, in case I haven't mentioned it before, I have been taking the University of Washington's 440-level biochemistry course this year. I took BIOC440 last quarter and it went really well, and now I'm in BIOC441. Next quarter, Lord willing, I'll make a pass at BIOC 442. So far I'm loving it. We had the first midterm of the quarter today, so we'll have to see how it went.

PERSONALLY: I have felt drained by life lately, and I really feel the need to slow things down. There are many old commitments that I have made but failed to follow through on. There are many people that I need to spend time with, but have been too hurried. There are many people that I need to thank in writing, or to encourage with a quick hello.

In December I lost an old friend, Justin Key, to a pulmonary embolism. He was only 26, a graduate student at the University of Virginia in the Darden Business School MBA program, with a full life ahead of him. Or so we all thought... since his passing I've been thinking a lot about how short and fleeting life is. Why do YOU think that you will wake up tomorrow? Why do I? God has numbered our days, so we should make the most of every opportunity. Thank you, Justin, for being a good friend over these fifteen (or however long) years, for living your life to the fullest, and for leaving behind the legacy of a good name.

More to come. Here's a good one of JK, from another old friend.

Back Home

2009-08-17T17:19:00.000-07:00

I'm back home now.

My flights from Lusaka -- Johannesburg -- London -- Los Angeles went really well. Jetlag management was decent; I tried to sleep as much as I could until London, then tried to stay awake from London to the West Coast. Having movies on the plane definitely helped!

When I got to L.A. at 2:30pm, the plane didn't really taxi in until 3:00. I had a flight to catch at 5:00 (from L.A. to Oakland), so that meant that I only had 120 minutes to get my checked baggage, make it through customs, switch terminals, check my bags again for domestic flight, and make it back through security. I made it with a full 10 minutes to spare!

So I made it in to Seattle at 10:30pm on Friday night, was in bed by 1:30am, and was up at 7:30 so I could meet my friend Sean Kelly in Seattle to pick up my tux for his wedding. Then a hair cut, wedding photos, and a super sweet wedding. The reception was great, too, with lots of good friends and fun dancing. When I went to the after party at Allison's parents house afterwards I was just about ready to crash, but I pushed myself for a few more hours... bed by midnight.

So congrats, Sean and Alli! It was quite a day, and I was glad I could make it back in time to celebrate with you. My prayer is that you would enjoy a long, happy marriage -- just know that you are loved and you will always have a community of friends to support you.

Work kicks back up on Wednesday, but I've got a lot of loose ends to tie up from my trip, so the next few days should keep me busy.

Salsa Adventures

2009-07-30T12:55:00.000-07:00

A few days ago Steve and Stephanie asked me what foods I was starting to miss from back in the states. At the time I wasn't quite sure, but maybe thinking about it for a couple of days helped to clarify things. So today, as I was walking through the grocery store, I realized that I had a craving for corn chips and salsa. Which are delicious.

So I went to the chip aisle. The only corn chips they had were Doritos (in the super-sweet, non-U.S. flavors, of course), but that isn't really what I was looking for. Failure #1. Then I walked over to the aisle where there theoretically ought to be salsa. I wasn't expecting a grand selection or anything, but all they had was mango salsa. Delicious, but not what I was looking for... Failure #2.

On my way out of the store, however, I came across a pack of "chapaties," which looked strangely identical to tortillas, and an idea sparked into my head -- why not make chips and salsa?!? What could possibly be more delicious? What could possibly go wrong? How hard can it be? So I got a bunch of veggies and headed home.

Kamryn and I decided that we wanted to make our treat as a surprise for dinner, and Bradyn joined in a little bit later. Jennifer Rhoda hung out with us for a while taking pictures with my camera, talking on my phone, and wearing my backpack.

Anyways, the girls and I chopped up tons of tomatoes and onions and garlic and green/red peppers for the salsa, and we got the tortillas cut up into "chip" shapes. The recipe we found said that we needed to brush the chips with veggetable oil before baking them, so as I was working on chopping stuff, Bradyn and Kamryn found some oil in a cool little spray bottle, and we put it on the chips. I used three red peppers in the salsa, but made sure to take the seeds out first.

We finished up the first batch of chips, and the salsa, just as dinner was ready. But as we started to try out the goods, we quickly realized that some things were amiss:

1) First of all, the stuff that the girls sprayed on the chips is not what we thought it was. Somehow it made the chips really hot (as in spicy), so that as Kamryn tried her first chip, she started coughing and needed to drink a ton of water.

2) When I tasted my first chip, I realized that the salsa was VERY hot. I mean, hotter than Seattle weather right now. :) I was ok with it, but Bradyn could only have a little bit before needing a big glass of water. Soon the girls were actually crying because their mouths were burning so much. When we went back to the Allen's house Stephanie googled "chili pepper burns" and was able to soothe things a bit, but then at dinner Kamryn rubbed her eyes with some pepper juice on her hands. Ouch. That hurts like the dickens, so dinner was interrupted with some more crying.

So all that being said, an innocent chips and salsa surprise turned into a massive crisis with on-the-fly medical care administered via milk and yogurt and olive oil. Maybe next time I can try to avoid using the hottest peppers in the universe for a makeshift corn chip dip. Or maybe we can search for a "mild" recipe :)

Thoughts on Church

2009-07-20T12:45:00.000-07:00

So far it has been interesting to visit the compound churches here in Zambia. I have been privileged to visit five congregations so far, each from a different suburb of Lusaka, ranging from 20 people in attendance to more than 300. Each experience has been different, but I have noticed some interesting common denominators that each church has shared so far.

(1) Church is between 2 1/2 and 3 1/2 hours long. One of the services I went to began at 9:00 and ended at around 1:00.

(2) When the leader of the congregation says, "Let us pray now for..." or "we are going to pray that...", what he/she means is that EVERYONE is going to pray out loud to God at the same time. So everyone audibly speaks their prayer to God together at the same time, the effect of which is a sort of a loud amalgam of voices.

(3) Visitors (or maybe just Muzungu's?) are given seats at the front of the congregation, sometimes with their own small table, and bottled water.

(4) When church is over, the pastor (or "man of God") exits first and stands at the front door of the church. Then the guests/muzungu's exit, shaking the pastor's hand, and form a line behind the pastor so that everyone in the congregation shakes everyone else's hand.

(5) Services are divided up into different chunks, and not everyone comes to everything. The first part is usually intercession -- church leaders meeting before the service to pray for the day, for the people as they make their way to church, and so on. Sometimes there is a Bible study after intersession, which is a time for the pastor or teacher/elder to lead the core of the church in a more personal "teaching" environment. There aren't a lot of kids or families at this if it happens. Then, as the women and children begin to arrive, there is a time of worship (sometimes led by a choir, if there is one), an offering, and a set of announcements (just like in the states) in no particular order. At around 11:30 there is a sermon... or two. The day's offering is usually announced at the end of the service.

(6) At one of the churches I went to there was a separate youth church, but it took place during the teaching time before worship. For the most part, the kids just hang out with the rest of the congregation for all three hours of church.

(7) Worship is usually in Nyanja and English. Sometimes the pastor will give the sermon in both languages at once -- speaking one sentence at a time in each language -- and sometimes the pastor will have an interpreter. Worship music may or may not have instrumentation apart from clapping.

(8) I have not yet had communion with a congregation here. Luke mentioned to me that there is often an afternoon service where the congregation will break bread together, but it is hard to tell if this happens in smaller, more impoverished congregations. If they do take communion, I have yet to determine the frequency -- is it once per month like in my congregation back in the States? Or only if/when they can afford bread and drink for an entire congregation? An issue like this is very interesting to think about in the context of poverty,

(9) There has not been as much "crazy stuff" as I expected, even in the pentecostal churches. No one has been slain in the spirit or anything like that -- the most common thing has been speaking in tongues. Women will occasionally holler during prayer times.

(10) There is no problem at all here with women pastors. It is very interesting to me how this happens everywhere in the world, when God's word is so clear on the issue. Just like in the States, I have seen far more women in the churches than men.

God is good... (echo: all the time!). All the time... (echo: God is good!).

Grasshopper

2009-07-05T08:28:00.000-07:00

I took this video on my third or fourth day here, when I was in Makeni with Tyler.

4th of July

2009-07-04T12:06:00.000-07:00

“Not all those who wander are lost.” - J. R. R. Tolkien

Today is the 4th of July. Of course that means just about nothing here in Zambia, except that it is Saturday, and on Saturday the malls are full of Westerners. So after spending the morning in the office reading (while a pastor and a couple of his employees put some windows into our classroom) I decided to just walk around the city. All day long.

So in the early afternoon I set out from the office on foot. When I got downtown I grabbed lunch at a cafe where they had an "Obama Special," which turned out to be fried chicken and french fries. Not a bad spread for $4, eh?

Then I just wandered up and down the streets of the city for the next three hours. I saw a couple of things that made me chuckle -- a minibus pulling another minibus with a plastic pipe and a string, a gal in a Huskies sweatshirt (I had a Huskies hat on, so we talked for a minute or so), and the Zambian equivalent of Kentucky Fried Chicken. I walked a ways down Cairo Road (the main North/South street) behind some ladies with stuff balanced on their heads. I feel like there are things that I see periodically that really remind me I'm in Africa.

Fun interaction of the day: at one point I took a picture of gas prices, and all of a sudden a guy ran up to me from across the street and asked me some sort of a question in ragged english. After a minute or two I figured out that he was asking if I had a permit to take photos (of course I didn't), and he wanted me to come with him to the police station. Since the guy was wearing jeans and a sweatshirt I decided I didn't believe him, so I asked to see his badge. "No, don't ask me that," he said. "Let's go, let's go." The guy was obviously full of it, so I took my camera out and showed him as I deleted the picture. I probably didn't even need to do that. Anyways, I told him I wouldn't take any more pictures and then just walked away.

Towards the end of the day I rested by the Freedom Statue (above, courtesy this guy), which was erected on the 10th anniversary of Zambia's independance. It struck me that I was there on my country's independance day, half way across the world... I'm not quite sure if that's significant at all, but it was cool nonetheless. I talked with some street kids and bus drivers there for a bit before heading over to the US embassy for the evening and eating burgers with Tracy and Karen. It was interesting to be around so many Americans in the evening after having been the only white person in sight all day long.

I'm going to try to go to a pentecostal church tomorrow that I hear has 3+ hour church services. Should be fun :)

So... I'm in Africa

2009-07-02T10:08:00.001-07:00

Hey there!

Today marks the three week mark of my time in Zambia. It has been really good. Here's a brief synopsis:

(1) Week One - All my flights went as smooth as they possibly could have. I got into Lusaka and was greeted at the airport by the smiles of Steve and Tyler before being shuttled around town for a bit. I stayed the first night with Tyler at a house in Makeni, which is a suburb of Lusaka, and was able to get a full night's rest, which was great. My first real experience with JetLag wasn't too bad, and I was ok on day three.

The rest of the week was spent with Tyler and Steve and Megan, just learning the city and learning what Action Zambia is doing in its various ministries. Public transportation here is pretty interesting, and I've got some great stories that I'll have to post later. All the missionaries here have been very gracious and generous with me so far; I had dinner with all but one of the families my first week here.

(2) Week Two - A short-term team from Vacaville, CA, came into town a couple of weeks ago to do some work with a farm we have called Cianjano ("Fellowship" in Nyanja). I hung with them for the week just digging 5' x 16' x 9' pit latrines, planting trees, and hanging out with kids from the local villiages. I love that stuff: kids are the same everywhere, it doesn't matter what culture they grow up in or what language they speak. We also tore down an Insaka (an African gazebo), and watched as ladies came from the villiage to make brooms from the straw roof as we tore it down. They'll sell them in the market later for 1,000 to 2,000 kwacha (20 to 40 cents).

(3) Week Three - The team took a trip down to Livingstone to see

Victoria Falls and catch a safari, but I decided not to go with them... instead I moved into Steve and Stephanie's guest room last weekend, and have been spending time getting to know the projects that I'll be working on the rest of the way out. I'm excited for this next month, as I'll hopefully be diving into the lives of 15 local pastors, getting to know them and their congregations, and just helping out the Action office wherever I'm needed.

More to come!

Quantum Mechanics

2009-04-06T11:17:00.000-07:00

Quantum Mechanics is an amazing thing. I've been house/dog/bird sitting for the past few days and I brought one of my college textbooks along, since I figured I would have time to burn. My biggest school is on spring break this week so I've been able to read up on some concepts that have been getting a bit rusty.

Here's is a pretty great video showing one of the most mind-boggling experiments we can do. Corny, I know, but pretty great! Enjoy...

Christians Never Say Goodbye

2009-03-16T23:00:00.000-07:00

I haven't updated for some time, but thought I would do a special update in honor of a man who was a good friend, a mentor, and a teacher.

Chris Kimball passed away in his sleep this past Tuesday, March 10th, at the age of 56. I took guitar lessons from Chris from the age of 10 until the age of 15, and learned from him every tool needed to continue to grow and learn as a guitarist and a musician. Chris and his wife, Jay Lynne, were some of the first family friends that we made when we moved to Seattle from New Mexico in 1991, so I have known him since I was seven years old.

Before I ever even showed an interest in guitar, Chris had shown an interest in me. When he found out that I liked Star Trek and was interested in outer space, he invited me over to his house to watch the movie Space Camp, and he made me his "world famous" grilled-cheese sandwiches. At church campouts he would take me out on his boat with the other kids to go tubing, and he would always have a guitar waiting back at the campsite. A favorite song I'll always remember was his rendition of "Whale of A Tale". Chris was an absolutely amazing guitarist, and truly lived his life doing what he loved. At times in our lessions I can remember simply laughing in disbelief as he would make his guitar do incredible things.

Every hour I spent with Chris was much more than a guitar lession. Many, many times we would not even pick up our guitars, but would instead talk about things like confidence, or education, or girls, or whatever else might be beneficial for me to learn and ponder. If Chris had a sarcastic, rough exterior (and he did), then he had an equally sober and kind spirit which would light a twinkle in his eye whenever he spoke to me about the Lord or about the things he had learned over the course of his life. Chris was always extremely open about his past, about the things that he had seen and done and learned from, and he used our time together to impart wisdom just as much as music.

Chris and Jay Lynne moved to Wenatchee in 2001 and I stopped taking lessons. I only saw him once more -- at a Summer Safari in 2002 -- which is a fact that I now deeply regret. How hard would it have been to drive out to Wenatchee for one weekend? In hindsight there are many things that I want to tell Chris but I never did. How I would have enjoyed spending the day with him, years removed from my adolescence, able to discuss life and music and joy and girls! But that day now cannot come; at least not in this life.

This week has been a good time for me to reflect upon what the gospel of Jesus Christ offers you and I today. This life will end. And yet Jesus says a shocking, almost nonsensical thing to Martha in John 11, after her brother Lazarus has been dead for three days. He says, "I am the resurrection and the life; he who believes in Me will live even if he dies, and everyone who lives and believes in Me will never die. Do you believe this?"

That's a good question, Jesus. Do you? Do I? Is it true that Chris is alive today even though he is dead? If this is not true then I ought to grieve the loss of an old friend and mentor, for there is no hope of ever being reunited. And yet I know that Chris is now merely asleep in Christ, as Paul says in 1 Thessalonians 4:13-18. One day he will awake.

I know this has been a bit of a long post, but I'll finish up by sharing a passage from a book called A Severe Mercy, by Sheldon Vanauken, in which the author recounts the last time he saw his friend C.S. Lewis. I have not read the book myself, I should admit, but ever since hearing about this passage in a sermon many years ago I have not been able to forget it, and so will share it here:

“On that last day I met C.S. Lewis at the Eastgate for lunch. We talked, I recall, about death or, rather, awakening after death... I said it would be a sort of coming home, and he agreed. Lewis said that he hoped Davy and I would be coming back to England soon, for we mustn’t get out of touch. ‘At all events,’ he said with a cheerful grin, “We’ll certainly meet again, here - or there.’ Then it was time to go...

"When we emerged onto the busy High with the traffic streaming past, we shook hands, and he said, ‘I shan’t say goodbye. We’ll meet again.’ Then he plunged into the traffic. I stood there watching him. When he reached the pavement on the other side, he turned round as though he knew somehow that I would still be there in front of the Eastgate. Then he raised his voice in a great roar that easily overcame the noise of the cars and buses. Heads turned and at least one car swerved. ‘Besides,’ he bellowed with a great grin, ‘Christians NEVER say goodbye!’"

Lazy Afternoon...

2009-01-24T20:27:00.000-08:00

On Saturday afternoon I went to Starbucks after watching the Huskies grab first place in the PAC-10 from the clutches of the UCLA Bruins. It was a sweet game, but I missed a big chunk in the middle of the game because I had to meet a student for a tutoring session.

I went to the 'Bucks on the corner of Greenlake and Ravenna. It was totally packed as I went in to sit down, but I was able to find a spot in the corner in a pretty comfy chair. I went, in large part, to unwind -- to get out of my house and have time to people-watch and not be distracted by my computer or my roommates.

One of the things that I have been trying to do in the new year has been to listen to God for specific direction. I have a lot of big decisions coming up in my life, and I think there is a lot of anxiety in my heart right now about the future. What will I do next year? Should I continue to pursue a career in medicine? If so, how will I get there? Should I continue to serve at Crossroads or go with her church plant, The Downtown Church? Anyways, as a result of this line of thinking I found myself with a book about prayer on my lap and a fatty Bible on my armrest, my vanilla latte within arm's reach.

About two minutes after I sat down in the corner hoping to have some alone time, a fellow managed to sit down next to me and whip out his Bible and a pocket concordance, haha! So of course we struck up a converstation, and it turns out he is working for the Navigators doing something called Edgecorps. The really interesting part, though, is that several of my friends and roommates have been in a men's group for the past few years through the Navigators -- and, as the Lord would have it, the leader of the study is my new friend's boss, and the study happens to take place every Thursday night in my new friend's house. Small world: we turned out to have a solid set of 5 or 6 mutual friends right off the bat.

God has a funny way of using the time that we give to Him: we were each encouraged a great deal by our conversation, and as we compared what God has been teaching us I was keenly aware that God was using fellowship to speak to me instead of solitude. Which is interesting. Certainly there are times when we ought to be alone and be quiet before the Lord, listening to His still voice (which I need to do far more consistently in my life -- see "often" in Luke 5:16). Yet this weekend He used a conversation to speak to a specific circumstance in my life, when I had intended to hear from Him in solitude and "alone time."

John Owen

2009-01-07T01:14:00.001-08:00

"John Owen’s treatises on Indwelling Sin in Believers and The Mortification of Sin are, in my opinion, the most helpful writings on personal holiness ever written."

-- Jerry Bridges

I just finished a book called Triumph Over Temptation which is a modern repackaging of three books by a guy with a cool name who lived in the mid-1600s. This was my second time through, and I think I will need to make it a commonly revisited friend. Every time I read it I am reminded of how SERIOUS sin is in our lives, and how diligently it needs to be guarded against with prayer and truth from God's Word. Does anyone talk like this anymore??

Some of the most piercing quotes, and most applicable to myself:

"Do not flatter yourself that you can hold out against temptation's power. Secret lusts lie lurking in your own heart that will never give up until they are either destroyed or satisfied."

"If sin entangles us in one area of our life, it will ensnare every area of our life."

"...both meditation and prayer particularly oppose indwelling sin. The are always designing the destruction of sin."

"When a man does not repent or deal with his sin, he cannot experience real peace in his soul."

"Satan blinds people to strive to serve God without having a real relationship to Him. To let sin alone in our lives is to permit sin to grow until it chokes and blinds the conscience. Not to conquer sin is to be conquered by sin."

"The excellency of a believer does not consist in how much he knows, but in what he assimilates and what becomes transformed within his soul."

------------

I know it has been a while, and that I should blog a bit more. Upon hearing that I was in danger of being removed from the "Blogs We Like" section of some close friends, I figured I can do better... :) I'll try to say a thing or two about my Christmas vacation if I get a chance!

Road Trip, Week Two

2008-08-18T15:43:00.000-07:00

It has been a few days since my last update... I actually managed to spill water on my laptop last week, so that is good. My keyboard doesn't really work right now, but I'll manage. On with the summary!

After leaving Yosemite we had one of our longest driving days, and so we left early in the morning from our beautiful camp site. Our goal was to get to Las Vegas for the evening, so we planned to just miss Death Valley on our way down, since our car didn't have air conditioning. It is not generally a good idea to drive in Death Valley without air conditioning. That being said, however, we made a slight adjustment to our itinerary and drove through the North end of the valley after seeing Scotty's Castle, which was built in the 1920s as a vacation home for a wealthy stock broker. But now it is just a bit of a tourist trap for the National Park:

We got to Vegas in the evening and found our room in the Plaza, which is where Sinatra and the Rat Pack used to hang out. We were across the street from something called the Fremont Street Experience, which is just a big street with cool movie-type stuff on the ceilings. Then on the next day we walked the Strip for five or six hours after swimming and seeing the new Batman movie at the Palms. Vegas is pretty fake and lived up to its reputation as 'Sin City:' we all agreed that we probably don't need to ever go back. But it was cool to see some of the famous buildings and people... in fact, I met Jessica Simpson, but she was in a hurry so the photo turned out blurry.

After Vegas we drove up to a National Park called Zion (yup... lots of Mormon stuff) for a couple of nights. This was the first of many "Southern Utah" parks -- there are several really cool parks in Utah, most of which have truly amazing rock formations and natural scenery. Zion, for example, sports tons of unique and awe-inspiring views of things like the Checkerboard Mesa. There is also a huge arch in the park, which we were only able to see from a distance, but which I will say more about in my next post anyway.

Our only full day there was spent on a hike up the 'Narrows,' which is, oddly enough, a narrow canyon with a river running through it, and which you can generally hike if there are no flash flood warnings. We walked through a canyon with (sometimes) 1,000 foot vertical cliffs on either side, making sure to look for flash-flood hiding spots along the way.

Our next stop was to the south of Zion -- the Grand Canyon, which is in Northern Arizona. But we decided to take a quick detour to the North first, to see Bryce Canyon. Bryce is another amazing place, but we only had a couple of hours to kill there, so we just went out to some lookouts. Here is a picture of Kyle on the rim of Bryce Amphitheater, which is beautiful:

When we got to the North Rim of the Grand Canyon, we set up camp and had dinner, but we also had our first big argument as a group of four men. Two weeks isn't bad when you think about it. :) We did go see the sun setting over the rim, however, which was a great experience and well worth a four mile hike in new flip-flops. Ouch. On the next day, then, we walked down the North Rim of the canyon along the North Kaibab Trail to Roaring Springs, which is a cool little spring where we were able to refresh and eat jerkey, carrots, and wheat thins. Quality meals always.

Again, we were on the edge of some hard-core cliffs, and were able to get some amazing views. And I probably shouldn't have put my legs over another ledge... oh well.

Road Trip, Week One

2008-08-10T21:47:00.000-07:00

I just returned last week from a great three week road trip with some of my best friends. More than seven months in the planning, "The Greatest Adventure, Year 2008" was truly an epic adventure, though it probably has a slightly inappropriate name when placed in the form of an acronym. I'm gonna try to do a three-post installment highlighting the best bits! First: allow me to introduce the gentlemen...

Jeff Hodgson, one of my best friends, is on the far left -- he and I went to Lake Washington High School together many moons ago, but we really didn't know each other until UW. Next is KB Baby, Kyle Bjorback, who has been a good buddy since we met at a Phi Kappa Tau "BMC" Weekend our freshman year, and who is getting married in two weeks to the beautiful Lisa Dubbs!! Third from left is the one and the only Jason Boyett, an old friend from Crossroads Bible Church and the fraternity. We used to ride the buses to Bellevue together and talk about girls. We still do the latter. :)

We woke up early on day one and hit the road for Crater Lake, and stopped for lunch at Burgerville, which is Oregon's rip-off of In'n'Out or Dicks. We got camp set up in time to take a hike up to the top of nearby Mt. Scott to watch the scenery -- our first of many hikes to come, and a good warm-up. This is a pic of Kyle and Jason near the top.

We left in the morning for our next stop -- Redwoods National Park in Northern California! The drive was pretty sweet, and I was able to drive along the coast for at bit on Highway 101, then through ancient redwood trees on a scenic drive through the park. The trees in this part of Northern California are really ancient and humongous, in large part because it does not so much rain as constantly "mist" in the forest.

Our campsite was right on the ocean and only a mile or so South of Fern Canyon, which is an amazing gully where they filmed a famous scene from Jurassic Park II. Our campsite neighbors turned out to be an old Christian couple named Jon and Joan Archer - Jon is a pastor and was a High School teacher for many years, and knew the park inside and out. It was a joy to meet them, and a privilege to spend time with them touring the canyon and learning about the history of local indian tribes. Above is Jason, walking through Fern Canyon.

After another night in Redwoods we drove down to Chico State University, where we were grateful for the hospitality of our Phi Kappa Tau brothers there. It was cool to drive through some serious forest fires on the way down -- at times the sky was red and the sun was hidden behind billows of smoke.

Yosemite was the next stop -- we spent three nights on the river just outside of the park there, and on our first full day we hiked up to Glacier Point along the "Four Mile Trail," which is actually 4.8 miles, and which has a 3200 foot elevation change from bottom to top. There are some seriously beautiful outlooks on the way up, and the view from the top would be worth it by itself. Here is the view from Glacier Point, which you can just drive up to if you like, but which is far more satisfying when earned. Then a pic of Jason with the rest of the valley behind him.

Our next day was a hike of Half Dome (you can see the dome in the above picture on the right), which was about an 18 mile day. Doing a 10 mile hike the day before might not have been the brightest thing ever, but we at least learned that we would need to bring about three gallons of water! At the top of the hike you have to climb up a super steep granite face along some cables, which were really busy on the day we went up (a Saturday). Here is a view from the top: you can't tell here, but Kyle and I are sitting next to a 1,300 foot cliff. I probably shouldn't have dangled my feet from the edge, but you only live once, right?

Beautiful Poetry

2008-07-04T01:54:00.000-07:00

Although the fig tree blossom not,
And all the vines of our small plot
Be barren, and the olive fail,
The sheep grow weak and heifers frail,
We will rejoice in God, my love,
And take our pleasures from above:
The Lord, our God, shall be our strength
And give us life, whatever length
On earth he please, and make our feet
Like mountain deer, to rise and cleat
The narrow path for man and wife
That rises steep and leads to life.

-- John Piper

I really like Piper's poetry, and I think it is one of the coolest parts of his ministry. Some days I find myself writing poems in my head, but I never really get around to writing them down for whatever reason. It wasn't until tonight that I realized that my "head" poetry is really similar to Piper's in terms of the meter. He fairly consistently rhymes in pairs of lines, or alternating lines, and will often carry a sentence past the break of the line, so as to match words from the middle of his sentences.

I should write some of my poetry down. But it probably won't ever find its way online... :)

Thomas Watson

2008-07-01T15:12:00.000-07:00

"Christians, do you have a sad resentment of other things and not of sin?"

I just finished Watson's "Doctrine of Repentance," which I have started to read many different times in my life but never finished. It takes hard work to get through anything written by a puritan, and Watson is one of the easier ones. Every paragraph I read made me want to put the book down, journal, and work on something in my life for a month or two. It felt weird to plow through pages at a time.

One of his best thoughts -- and by best I think I mean most applicable to me -- was in a section in which he was discussing repentance among the church:

"Repent of your non-improvement of talents. Health is a talent; estate is a talent; wit and parts are talents; and these God has entrusted you with to improve for His glory. He has sent you into the world as a merchant sends his factor beyond the seas to trade for his master's advantage, but you have not done the good you might. Can you say, 'Lord, thy pound hath gained five pounds' (Luke 19:18)? O mourn at the burial of your talents! Let it grieve you that so much of your age has not been time lived but time lost; that you have filled up your golden hours more with froth than with spirits."

This thought got me pretty good. A few months back I was able to have coffee with an old mentor and family friend, whose advice to me was to find my talents - to look at the things that I enjoy doing and that I am good at. Why? Because God has made me with a unique concoction of talents and passions, which are His gifts to me, and He expects me to use them! How am I improving on, and nurturing, the talents that God has given me?

About Time. Geez.

2008-06-19T11:21:00.000-07:00

It's been a while. I am definitely a 'cyclic' blogger, and it just hasn't occurred to me to blog for the past month-and-a-half or so. My bad.

WELLLL... a lot has happened! I didn't get that job at the Seattle Biomedical Research Institute, even though the interview went GREAT, but that is ok. It just means that God wants me somewhere else. I'm patient and I'm working hard - holding up my end of the bargain, so to speak - and God has provided thus far. Tutoring has been good, and the agency that I work for has made it clear that if I want to work full time for them in the fall, they would be willing to have me. That wouldn't be too bad at all, but it is still not quite what I want to do. It isn't the 'career' move I am looking for, even if it pays very well.

What DO I want to do? In the long term it is still medicine. I merely don't know how to GET there, which is why I have been looking for a job in the medical sciences for the past 8 or 9 months. But this has been very difficult for me, because at the start I feel that I am at a disadvantage, in that my degree is in something totally unrelated. Every time I write a cover letter or apply anywhere I feel like I need to explain myself extensively: "Well, I got a degree in math, but what I really want to do is work towards medical school." Plus, I am already at a disadvantage because Seattle is outrageously overeducated. To live here and have a degree is like living here and eating bubble gum. It barely matters.

Things have happily been very rich apart from career frustration. I'm continuing to learn a lot about life and God and family and community and everything else. Last week I turned 23 years old, and I can hardly believe it -- that is OLD. (Alright, I know it is still pretty young, but it shows that time is flying.) I don't have much time left to be young, so I want to start making the most of it :) It is interesting that God's Word has a lot to say about being young... look at some of these bad boys:

For You are my hope; O Lord GOD, You are my confidence from my youth...O God, You have taught me from my youth, And I still declare Your wondrous deeds.
--Psalm 71:5,17

How can a young man keep his way pure? By keeping it according to Your word.
--Psalm 119:9

Let our sons in their youth be as grown-up plants...
--Psalm 144:12

The Proverbs of Solomon the son of David, king of Israel... to give prudence to the naive, to the youth knowledge and discretion...
--Proverbs 1:1,4

The glory of young men is their strength, and the honor of old men is their gray hair.
--Proverbs 20:29

Rejoice, young man, during your childhood, and let your heart be pleasant during the days of young manhood. And follow the impulses of your heart and the desires of your eyes. Yet know that God will bring you to judgment for all these things. So, remove grief and anger from your heart and put away pain from your body, because childhood and the prime of life are fleeting.
--Ecclesiastes 11:9-10

Remember also your Creator in the days of your youth, before the evil days come and the years draw near when you will say, "I have no delight in them"
--Ecclesiastes 12:1

It is good for a man that he should bear the yoke in his youth.
--Lamentations 3:27

Let no one look down on your youthfulness, but rather in speech, conduct, love, faith and purity, show yourself an example of those who believe.
--1 Timothy 4:12

I am writing to you, young men, because you have overcome the evil one... I have written to you, young men, because you are strong, and the word of God abides in you, and you have overcome the evil one.
--1 John 2:13-14

BOOM. There it is. The prime of life is fleeting! NOW is the time to make God the source of all my confidence, to live according to His Word in knowledge and discretion, to remember Him, and to be pure and strong. And I want to learn to rejoice! In Christ we have an amazing source of joy every day and at every moment, because we have Him in the midst of any trial and in the face of any circumstance, whether it be fantastic or miserable at the surface level. He came that we may have life, and have it abundantly -- all in the midst of any heartache, difficulty, frustration, or trial. I have been thinking a lot lately about a verse in Habbakuk that I hope will encourage you, and I'll end with that, but there should be more updates to come.

Though the fig tree should not blossom And there be no fruit on the vines,
Though the yield of the olive should fail
And the fields produce no food,
Though the flock should be cut off from the fold
And there be no cattle in the stalls,
Yet I will exult in the LORD,
I will rejoice in the God of my salvation.
--Habakkuk 3:17-18

Butterflies

2008-04-27T14:35:00.000-07:00

I have a job interview tomorrow.

Back in mid-February, you may remember (if anyone reads this, haha), I missed out on a job opportunity with the Seattle Biomedical Research Institute because I was in Ensenada. I was pretty bummed, but shortly afterward I was able to find work as a tutor, and have been doing that ever since.

Since that time I have applied for jobs with 5 or 6 more laboratories, and no one has so much as given me the time of day. It is really easy to get discouraged, that is for sure, and this season has caused me to think about where my future will be. Will I work in education? If so, why do I still have these strong (and growing?) desires to be a doctor, to administer medical care to the poor, to feed the hungry, and to comfort the frightened? I DO enjoy working with High Schoolers, teaching students about stuff that they struggle to understand through their normal coursework, but this time has taught me that I want more than that. I still want to be a doctor. This past week I read a book called "Mountains Beyond Mountains" that really challenged me, and made me yearn to be a doctor. I almost couldn't take it.

So, tomorrow I am interviewing with SBRI. A couple of weeks ago they called me and asked if I would still be interested in a job with the same laboratory as before, working on Malaria vaccines. It turns out they have one more position that they want to fill, slightly different than what I had initially applied for, but still right up my alley. I am trying not to be anxious about it, not to have "butterflies," but it is hard. This is not only the first (real) job interview of my life, but it is also with a couple of VERY important PhD-level, we-pull-in-millions-of-dollars-of-grants-and-employ-dozens-of-other-PhD-level-scientists type Malariologists. I will need to be on my game, I will need to know exactly what I am talking about, and I am not entirely sure what to expect.

If you read this blog between Sunday night and Monday afternoon, then, please remember to pray for me. God is GOOD and He has something for me, but I want to FIND it! If God calls me to work in medicine someday, then He will open the doors that I will need to get there. He has given me these desires for a reason, but I also need to subject my desires to Him. "He is not in such a hurry as we are, and it is not his way to give more light on the future than we need for action in the present, or to guide us more than one step at a time." (J.I.P.) For now, all I know is that my next step comes tomorrow: I have only to be faithful for my part, and He will certainly be faithful in His.

Letters to Children

2008-04-24T15:25:00.000-07:00

"If you continue to love Jesus, nothing much can go wrong with you, and I hope you may always do so. I'm so thankful that you realized [the] 'hidden story' in the Narnian books. It is odd, children nearly always do, grown-ups hardly ever."

-- C.S. Lewis, written to "Ruth" on October 26, 1963, four weeks before he died.

Waiting

2008-04-13T23:59:00.000-07:00

"'Wait on the Lord' is a constant refrain in the Psalms, and it is a necessary word, for God often keeps us waiting. He is not in such a hurry as we are, and it is not his way to give more light on the future than we need for action in the present, or to guide us more than one step at a time. When in doubt, do nothing, but continue to wait on God. When action is needed, light will come."

--J.I. Packer, "Knowing God"

Do I agree with the last thing he says here?

"Wait for the LORD; Be strong and let your heart take courage; Yes, wait for the LORD."

--Psalm 27:14

Languages

2008-03-25T22:38:00.000-07:00

Languages are interesting. I am not smart enough to think about everything that is involved when we speak to one another, or read, or listen to the spoken word, or whatever. I simply don't have the energy or the capacity to develop a "philosophy of language," or whatever you want to call it, that some of my friends can -- a philosophy about how words transmit information, and about whether this is a learned or an inherent behavior in us, and so on. All I know is that, for whatever reason, I enjoy speaking Spanish and I really don't like French. Maybe that kind of thing is just a matter of taste, or maybe I simply associate my experiences learning and speaking Spanish with the language itself, and the same with French. Probably. All I know is that I am not totally alone in preferring certain languages:

"Even now I cannot fully understand why the Greek language, which I learned as a child, was so distasteful to me. I loved Latin, not the elementary lessons but those which I studied later under teachers of literature."
--Augustine's Confessions, I.13

So if Augustine can get away with it, so can I. :) I do think it is important, however, to understand both the limitations and the amazing potential of language when we read the Bible. I was thinking about it today when reading Ecclesiastes, because sometimes (especially in Biblical poetry) a verse in the NIV can be really different in the NASB. The verses I was thinking about today are Ecclesiastes 12:13-14:

"Now all has been heard: here is the conclusion of the matter: fear God and keep His commandments, for this is the whole duty of man. For God will bring every deed into judgement, including every hidden thing, whether it is good or evil." (NIV).

"The conclusion, when all has been heard, is: fear God and keep His commandments, because this applies to every person. For God will bring every act to judgement, everything which is hidden, whether it is good or evil." (NASB).

I was reading this verse in the NIV today and something really jumped out at me. It was kind of cool actually -- it donned on me that the words "duty" and "this" are singular, while TWO things are listed as being the "conclusion of the matter." That is, THE duty is actually two things, namely to fear God and keep His commandments." There is one duty - one thing that you and I should strive for each and every day. But that singular thing is two things.

This same idea comes up in the introductory chapter of John Piper's book Desiring God, where JP talks about the opening line of the Westminster Shorter Catechism: "The chief end of man is to glorify God and enjoy Him forever." He notes that there is a (singular) chief end of man, but that this end consists of two things - to glorify God AND to enjoy Him forever. Piper basically bases his entire book on the observation that glorifying God and enjoying Him are the same thing viewed from two different perspectives: thus, "God is most glorified in us when we are most satisfied in Him."

I think God plays with plurals like this in order to get us to look at ideas - and I think I might start looking for it more. One other example I can think of off the top of my head is in Galatians 5, where Paul is discussing the fruit (singular!) of the Spirit -- which is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control. One fruit, nine characteristics.

Anyways, that is just something to think about. God means to say that fearing Him and obeying His commandments are not two separate things, but one thing, expressed in two different ways with two different terms. It would be worth it to sit down and think long and hard about how that is true. At the very least, it got me thinking today about languages because this same observation is a lot harder to make - at least it is more subtle - when you read the text in the NASB. You would need to see the singular in the phrase "this applies to every person, " which could refer to the "conclusion" rather than the fearing of God and the following of His commandments. It is still there, but the idea that is (probably?) in the original languages comes across better in certain English renderings than in others. To know for sure, of course, you would need to look into the original language to see where all the pronouns point. Anyone else have any examples of this type of stuff?

Ensenada

2008-03-10T23:13:00.000-07:00

Here it is, folks: the long-awaited Ensenada post!! I will try to put in lots of pictures for Daniel: I suppose it can't hurt to make my blog more "approachable". This post is kind of long, but I am really abbreviating things, so just take your time if you want to read through it.

So... as you may know, I was asked on late notice (four weeks or so ago) if I would be able to join the high school group at my church on a mission trip to Ensenada, Mexico, to build houses. After moving a couple of obstacles out of the way, I was free to commit to the trip, and we left town on Sunday the 17th of February.

The first thing that you should know is that the head coach of the UW Football team, Tyrone Willingham, was on our flight from Seattle to San José. Pretty awesome. We went on, of course, to San Diego, but I believe this was a crucial development for the success of our trip. Go Dawgs.

Once in San Diego, we got our vans and secured our luggage, and then made for In-n-Out Burger, a favorite California burger joint.

Being properly fueled, we then proceeded to drive across the border and into Tijuana. If you have ever made this trip you know what an amazing jump this is from wealth to poverty: there is an immediate dropoff. We experienced a moment of silent prayer as we drove through Tijuana, and then we made our way to Ensenada.

Our team worked with a ministry called Yugo. What is cool about Yugo is that they work through local ministries -- the families that we serve build relationship primarily with a local pastor and congregation, rather than with a parachurch organization or with a group of high schoolers who may never return.

We had approximately 38 students and 12 staff make the trip, and the group was divided into four teams. On our first full day there, two of the teams went to one build site, and the other two teams went to a second site. I was on Team 4 (Team BONESAW), so the first day we went with Team 3 and put in a long day of work on a house for a very needy family. Our family consisted of a mother and her four-year-old son, Angél: the dad had passed away very shortly after Angél's birth, and so they lived with the Angél's grandmother. Both of these dear women are believers, which is somewhat odd for the families typically served by Yugo, but it was a great gift to us. It is amazing to see what sweet fellowship can be shared by Christians even when there is a significant language barrier. Here is Angél:

On the second and third days there, we split up so that half of the teams went to churches and did Vacation Bible School with little kids, while half of the teams stayed on the sites to work on the houses. On day two, my team stayed and put up drywall and roofing, then on day three we played with kids all day. It was pretty cool to work as a team, and we were blown away by the generosity of our family, who provided a meal for our entire team each day. It was said that each of these meals was worth about a months' wages for the family, which I think is probably close to the truth. It is hard to understand the depth of this.

Above is Ricardo, our build leader. He was a stud, and by the fourth day we had completed the house, and we were able to present our family with a new place to live. We dedicated the home to the Lord and prayed for the family, and were able to hand the keys over. "A Father for the fatherless and a Judge for the widows is God in His holy habitation; God makes a home for the lonely..." (Psalm 68:5-6).

On our fifth day in Mexico we went to a migrant camp several miles south of Ensenada. Camps like this are for the poorest of the poor, most of whom are coming from South America looking for a better life in the North. They sign their lives away to work in the agricultural fields, trying merely to provide food for their families. They live in converted chicken coops. Still working with Yugo, we were there mainly to help local pastors try to build relationship with the locals. I snuck a couple of pictures of their homes:

I am realizing that earthly poverty is far more the norm than the exception in this life, but the down side of this realization is that stuff like this is hard to internalize. I am still not sure how I am affected by this kind of poverty, and there were several others on our trip who were struggling with the same thing. Why am I not moved to tears when I see this? It is hard, for whatever reason, to truly be affected: maybe because it is truly hard for a rich man to enter the kingdom of heaven? I feel like my heart, while softening, is hardening at the same time. I am not sure if that makes any sense, but I need to think and pray about this. A lot. No man can serve both God and wealth. Maybe Christ actually means it when He says we should use our wealth to make friends, who will then recieve us into eternal dwellings (Luke 16)? And what does He mean when He says that "none of you can be My disciple who does not give up all his own possessions" (Luke 14)?

After visiting the migrant camp we went to La Bufadora, where there is a pretty cool (natural) waterspout. Then we went back to Yugo for the last night, where we washed one another's feet. It was a neat experience. God is good.

"Come over here!"

2008-03-05T14:45:00.000-08:00

"They passed through the Phrygian and Galatian region, having been forbidden by the Holy Spirit to speak the word in Asia; and after they came to Mysia, they were trying to go into Bithynia, and the Spirit of Jesus did not permit them; and passing by Mysia, they came down to Troas. A vision appeared to Paul in the night: a man of Macedonia was standing and appealing to him, and saying, 'Come over to Macedonia and help us.' When he had seen the vision, immediately we sought to go into Macedonia, concluding that God had called us to preach the gospel to them." -- Acts 16:6-10.

My friend and pastor Matt Chapman shared this passage with me last week. It is interesting that the Holy Spirit specifically forbids Paul and his companions from doing things... we tend to think of Him only as empowering and urging us towards specific goals. I am not sure why we think that: God is not a machine - a set of cosmic rules. Rather, He is our Father, directing us where we ought to go and guiding us away from the things we ought to avoid.

I did not get an interview at the Seattle Biomedical Research Institute. If you read my previous post you will see that God directed events to this effect, leading me away from what in MY wisdom would have seemed a fantastic opportunity. God wants me somewhere else, and the first step in getting me there might be through tutoring.

Read this.

A few days ago my close friend Jeff sent me the contact info for a tutoring position at Lakeside School in Northern Seattle. He had found the position, hoping to work as a part-time tutor while still in school, but he was unable to work the mid-day hours they were looking for, so he sent me the job. It turns out that:

(1) This job pays between $45 and $50 per hour
(2) They need tutoring help in General Chemistry and General Biology
(3) The job is at Lakeside School, where Bill Gates and Paul Allen went to High School, considered by many the best private school in the whole of the Northwestern United States.

I went in today and interviewed for the position; I have another meeting with more school staff on Friday morning. This will only be a part time position if I get it, and it will only last for two months, as I am essentially only filling in for a regular tutor. But it will certainly pay my bills for the time that I have it, and, as I understand it, this school has a fairly limited and exclusive tutor list... once you are on it, parents or students can contact you freely for help in your subjects of strength!

What this will force me to do, at the very least, is to learn introductory chemistry and biology inside and out. I already know them, but I will really need to know them. Whatever else my furure holds, that knowledge can't hurt. If the Spirit led me away from SBRI, is He leading me to Lakeside?

Providence

2008-03-02T13:13:00.000-08:00

"I know, O LORD, that a man's life is not his own; it is not for a man to direct his steps." -- Jeremiah 10:23.

In the past year I have begun, more and more, to look for meaning in the events of my life. Not that I never looked for meaning before this year, but as I grow older I am seeing God mold and shape my future before my very eyes. By God's mercy, having been stripped of much of the control that I thought I had over my life, I am finding more and more that I am the man in Proverbs 19:21 --"Many are the plans in a man's heart, but the counsel of the Lord, it will stand."

"But I tell you, in this you are not right, for God is greater than man. Why do you complain to him that he answers none of man's words? For God does speak - now one way, now another - though man may not percieve it. In a dream, in a vision of the night, when deep sleep falls on men as they slumber in their beds, he may speak in their ears and terrify them with warnings, to turn man from wrongdoing and keep him from pride, to preserve his soul from the pit, his life from perishing by the sword. Or a man may be chastened on a bed of pain with constant distress in his bones, so that his very being finds food repulsive and his soul loathes the choicest meal. His flesh wastes away to nothing, and his bones, once hidden, now stick out. His sould draws near to the pit, and his life to the messengers of death." -- Job 33:14-22.

I want to perceive when God speaks to me! The easiest way to do this is to be absorbed in His word. "But as for you, continue in what you have learned and have become convinced of, because you know the one from whom you learned it, and how from infancy you have known the holy Scriptures, which are able to make you wise for salvation through faith in Christ Jesus. All Scripture is God-breathed and useful for teaching, rebuking, correcting and training in righteousness, so that the man of God may be thoroughly equipped for every good work." -- 2 Timothy 3:14-17. But like Elihu says, God may speak to us in many other ways. I want to listen to Him in quiet moments of prayer, in the counsel of others, in fellowship, and in my circumstances.

Here is a quick story of how God has shaped my last few weeks: interspersed will be some pictures of my trip to Ensenada, so that I won't have to put them all in my next post. :)

A few weeks ago I applied for a post-bachelor fellowship at the Institute for Health Metrics and Evaluation in Seattle. This is a program that would have paid me money to get a Master's degree in Public Health. As I was waiting to hear back about my application status, however, I was given the opportunity to go to Ensenada, Mexico to build houses with my church High School group. The catch? I would potentially be in Mexico without communication, just when I would need to be checking my emails.

Fortunately I made a quick inquiry at the Institute, and found that I could (probably) arrange for my status email to be sent a bit early. It was. I was given the age-old polite let-down, "we still think you have great talent, etc." I was disappointed, but the Mexico trip was a go, my future once again uncertain.

So I went on the trip. It was great, but sobering. We built houses for widows and poor families, we were confronted with a poverty that is essentially alien to Seattle, and we got to experience a much less materialistic culture. I played with little kids a lot. I even turned off my phone for the whole week and didn't have internet access: not to have to worry about my application status at all was nice. When I got back to the States, however, I was overjoyed to see that I had received a voicemail message from the human resources guy at the Seattle Biomedical Research Institute! He wanted to see if I would be available to interview for a postion as a Lab Technician in Patrick Duffy's Lab, doing research with Malaria. He had called me on Monday -- we had left on Sunday -- and I didn't get the message until Saturday.

So I called the hr guy back on Monday. He wasn't there. No biggie - I tried again on Tuesday... same thing. Then Wednesday, then Thursday. Finally, on Friday, I spoke with him, and he said that they were almost done with the hiring process for the position. If they had not filled the position by Friday afternoon or Monday, they would call me to schedule an interview.

Sooooooo...... I really don't know what God is doing with this. But I want to listen. I may get a call to interview when Monday rolls around, but I also may not. All I know is that if I had not been in Ensenada, I would have simply answered my phone and scheduled an interview. If God doesn't want me to work in a Malaria lab and doesn't want me to study International Health, what does He have in store for me?

Mysterious Ways...

2008-03-01T14:25:00.000-08:00

The phrase "God works in mysterious ways" is never actually in the Bible. But I think it is absolutely true. Why God works things the way that He does is a mystery to me - indeed, His ways and His thoughts are far above yours or mine. Check out Isaiah 55!

So... I have a quick story. I think that God often does little things in our day that cause us (force us?), if nothing else, to be reminded of Him. My car, for instance, has a nasty habit of dying unexpectedly. Sometimes it dies at stoplights and sometimes on the freeway, but it always needs a few minutes to cool down and then it is good to go. Well, last night I was driving to the UW from Kirkland, and my car died on the 520 floating bridge. This is the second time this has happened in the past few months: first it happened going Eastbound, and last night Westbound.

What is amazing is that each time I have been able to coast to safety without hindering traffic at all! Here is a picture (courtesy of google maps) of where my car first died a couple of months ago, and where I was able to coast to safety at the service station:

Now here is a picture where my car died last night, and where I was able to pull to the side:

Weird, huh? Irritating as it was to have my car die again last night, it actually turned into an opportunity for me to stop and thank God for allowing me to be able to pull to the side of the road. I was then able to thank Him for the gift of even having a car at all, and for the many other blessings that I enjoy every day. God used this little detour in my day to remind me to be thankful. How easily we forget to give thanks in all things! (Ephesians 5:20)

In the next couple of days I hope to post about my trip to Ensenada, Mexico with the Crossroads High School group... Some pretty cool stuff happened that I want to write about. And God used the trip to really affect my circumstances back at home, too. More to come.

Friendship

2008-02-01T16:42:00.000-08:00

More from Confessions.

"...friendship had other charms to captivate my heart. We could talk and laugh together and exchange small acts of kindness. We could join in the pleasure that books can give. We could be grave or gay together. If we sometimes disagreed, it was without spite, as a man might differ with himself, and the rare occasions of dispute were the very spice to season our usual accord. Each of us had something to learn from the others and something to teach in return. If any were away, we missed them with regret and gladly welcomed them when they came home. Such things as these are heartfelt tokens of affection between friends. They are signs to be read on the face and in the eyes, spoken by the tongue and displayed in countless acts of kindness. They can kindle a blaze to melt our hearts and weld them into one." (VI.8)

"Let all who are truly my brothers love in me what they know from your teaching to be worthy of their love, and let them sorrow to find in me what they know from your teaching to be occasion for remorse. This is what I wish my true brother to feel in their hearts... But my true brothers are those who rejoice for me in their hearts when they find good in me, and grieve for me when they find sin. They are my true brothers, because whether they see good in me or evil, they love me still." (X.4)

"If I wish, I can become the friend of God at this very moment." (VIII.6, quoting Ponticianus)

Amen, brother A!

Augustine of Hippo

2008-01-30T13:15:00.000-08:00

I recently read Augustine's Confessions, and I can see why it is a classic. If his books are anything like him, he must have been an approachable, honest, and humble guy. Part of the reason classics have lasted for so long is that they speak to the human condition in some way, and a couple of passages in particular really struck me as "classic" when I read through this text. Augustine was a HUMAN, and he struggled with exactly the same things in the 400s that we struggle with today.

Does This Sound Like You? :

"I was astonished that although I now loved you and not some phantom in your place, I did not persist in enjoyment of my God. Your beauty drew me to you, but soon I was dragged away from you by my own weight and in dismay I plunged again into the things of this world. The weight I carried was the habit of the flesh. But your memory remained with me and I had no doubt at all that you were the one to whom I should cling, only I was not yet able to cling to you." (VII.17)

It strikes me that this is the condition of the entire American church today, and in this passage is the biggest reason that I enjoy the ministry of John Piper. Do I enjoy God? I mean really enjoy spending time in His presence, serving and worshiping Him, and obeying him? Here is where Augustine finds peace:

"I began to search for a means of gaining the strength I needed to enjoy you, but I could not find this means until I embraced the mediator between God and men, Jesus Christ, who is a man, like them, and also rules as God over all things, blessed for ever. He was calling to me and saying I am the way; I am truth and life. He it was who united with our flesh that food which I was too weak to take; for the word was made flesh so that your Wisdom, by which you created all things, might be milk to suckle us in infancy. For I was not humble enough to conceive of the humble Jesus Christ as my God, nor had I learnt what lesson his human weakness was meant to teach. The lesson is that your Word, the eternal Truth, which far surpasses even the higher parts of your creation, raises up to himself all who subject themselves to him. From the clay of which we are made he built for himself a lowly house in this world below, so that by this means he might cause those who were to be made subject to him to abandon themselves and come over to his side. He would cure them of the pride that swelled up in their hearts and would nurture love in its place, so that they should no longer stride ahead confident in themselves, but might realize their own weakness when at their feet they saw God himself, enfeebled by sharing this garment of our mortality. And at last, from weariness, they would cast themselves down upon his humanity, and when it rose they too would rise." (VII.18)

And again, "I was quite certain of these truths, but I was too weak to enjoy you. I used to talk glibly as though I know the meaning of it all, but unless I had looked for the way which leads to you in Christ our Saviour, instead of finding knowledge I should have found my end. For I had now begun to wish to be thought wise. I was full of self-esteem, which was a punishment of my own making. I ought to have deplored my state, but instead my knowledge only bred self-conceit. For was I not without charity, which builds its edifice on the firm foundation of humility, that is, on Jesus Christ?" (VII.20)

How often we lose track of Jesus! It was Jesus who saved Augustine from his pride and finally gave him lasting joy. If you are a sinner today, He is your only refuge. God is a consuming fire who burns up his adversaries: why not come to Him today? I think even Christians need to be constantly reminded that Christ is our only hope and joy - anything in His place brings only multiplied sorrows. His yoke is easy and his burden is light!

Been A While...

2008-01-10T00:35:00.000-08:00

Wow. September 27th is the last time I posted anything here. Obviously that whole Romans thing didn't work out :) -- don't get me wrong, I still read through the book a couple of times, but I clearly don't have the endurance to do any kind of regular updates about stuff. In the future, if you read this blog (I know a couple poor souls out there do), don't expect too many updates!

I did feel like doing an update, though. Mostly for Daniel, but a little bit because I feel guilty about having people check this every once and again only to see the same-old same-old. Ergo my thoughts: it is late and this post will probably contain a great deal of rambling. I am not really looking to a lot of scripture here, I just want to spout off a little.

(1) For those of you who don't know, I worked for Costco from the beginning of November to the end of December. I pulled carts around in the parking lot and I put groceries in boxes. Sometimes I removed boxes from carts. It felt like four months instead of two, but I learned a TON. Literally a ton. I thought I would post what I learned, partly so I won't forget it. It has been amazing to see my own heart in the past couple of months, and I wouldn't trade this time for anything. God has used it to teach me a lot about myself and about Himself.

-- Pride. I am a very proud person, but I never really saw it in its ugliness until I worked at Costco. The STRANGEST thing happened, and it happened over and over again. It went like this: First, I would see someone that I know who would be shopping at Costco. This happened all the time, because everyone shops at Costco. Literally everyone. After seeing this person, assuming I saw them from a distance and they didn't see me, my immediate instinct was to AVOID them. I was ashamed to work at Costco, because I have a degree, and because people who have degrees don't work at Costco unless it is in the corporate offices. If I did not avoid the person (I didn't always try), I found that my inclination -- my overwhelming desire -- was to EXPLAIN myself. I wanted to tell the story of how I got to the Costco parking lot, wearing an orange vest and a nametag. Costco was my "post-college relax" job, I was looking for a "real" job, etc. I felt like I had to explain myself so I wouldn't be judged.

I realized really quickly that there are a couple of angles to this. The first is that I felt like Costco was a bad job. Don't get me wrong, I do think it is vastly under my potential (when I was interviewing for the seasonal job the interviewer lady asked me, "and you want to push carts?!?"), but it really isn't a bad job. In fact, it is a really great gig. One of the managers there (he has been there five years) double-majored at the UW. Another gal I worked with had just graduated. In short, there is no shame in working for Costco: a lot of their employees are continuing their educations while they work their way up internally, learning about retail and customer service. Most non-student-types are there because it is their career, and are looking for nothing more than to move up in the company. This has a great deal to do with the fact that the money is really good for what it is. I really can't imagine what upheaval my heart would have experienced had my job been at McDonald's or Safeway or something else.

The second angle here is that I subconsciously DEVALUE people based on where they work. It was weird to feel like people were looking down on me because my job was to push their carts around, but I realized that I do the same thing to others all the time. I see myself as intelligent, educated, and therefore important, so that when I go to the gas station or to the grocery store, I look down on the people who work in those places. I ask myself, though rarely in so many words, "what did this person do to end up here? Did they drop out of high school? Do they lack initiative? How can they do this every day of their lives?" I condescend to people who are not walking around in the halls of a university, or who do not like talking about metaphysics or cosmology, or who don't yearn to transform the world in their day-to-day lives. I think we all condescend to those around us because it makes us feel bigger. I find, however, that as a follower of Jesus I have no right to look down on anyone. Ever. With humility of mind I should consider others better than myself: I ought to look not only to my own interests, but also to the interests of others, and my attitude should be the same as that of Christ Jesus, who, being in the very nature God, did not consider equality with God something to be grasped, but made Himself nothing, taking the very nature of a servant. Being found in appearance as a man, He became obedient to death, even death on a cross! This is hard because we are so hard-wired for selfishness that we hardly even see it when we are proud and selfish. Oh, how we need to pray for God's grace!

I think it might be interesting to do a Bible study on pride. A cursory word search of "pride" in the Word of God turns in tons of results. God cares about this. He will not despise a broken and contrite spirit.

-- Wealth. I don't ever think I will own a luxury vehicle, ever. Cars are tools to be used, and they cost money. How can anyone justify buying a BMW or Lexus SUV? Praise God for the time I spent at the UW, time I spent realizing that Christ was not a Republican in an SUV. I think God cares way more about the way we use our money - our own, personal, where-it-hurts-money - to fix injustice and poverty in the world than he does about supply-side economics. I finally just read Donald Miller's Blue Like Jazz, and he is right: "We don't need as much money as we have."

-- Health: At Costco I was essentially paid to work out. It was pretty nice, especially when I would walk the couple of miles to work instead of drive. On those days I probably walked 10 miles, most of the time carrying around massive loads of carts. One of the really interesting things I found while working there, however, was how many people smoked cigarettes. Lots of people still smoke. A surprising number, it seemed to me: even people that you wouldn't peg as smokers were smoking like chimneys at Costco. The more I think about it, the more I think that smoking is a spiritual issue. Sure, there are plenty of folks who smoke and are not controlled by the habit, much the same way folks drink (I think of Donald Miller, for example, or JRR Tolkien or CS Lewis or GK Chesterton or CH Spurgeon or many of my friends). But I felt like at Costco, smoking was a release for people. They get stressed out, so they smoke. They need somewhere to go, and cigarettes are always there to calm their nerves. I am sure this could unfold into a huge discourse about how the body and the soul are intertwined and about how modern medicine treats our base physiology but not our spirit, but I don't really want to talk about that. I just think it is interesting, is all, because cigarettes are so obviously detrimental to health, and because "the body is not made for immorality, but for the Lord, and the Lord for the body." (1 Cor. 6:13). Our bodies are meant, as John Piper says, to "make God look precious."

(2) It is 2008 now. That's crazy. I was talking to a friend recently, and for some reason felt compelled to mention how clearly I remember 1995. I was in 4th grade, the Mariners won the AL West (I went to a game where Tino Martinez hit a home run in the bottom of the 9th to beat the A's 9 to 8), there was a big earthquake in Japan, Bill Clinton was president and the Unibomber was doing a bunch of stuff. Crazy. That was 13 years ago. I have been a guitar player for 12 years now.

(3) With the new year I am always tempted to make resolutions, and then I always do, but then I always break them by the middle of January or so. Especially if the resolutions have to do with dealing with my sin in some sort of legalistic way: I almost always watch the show or waste the time or do the thing that I said I wouldn't watch or waste or do. It is exactly like wanting to do a blog about the book of Romans: my intentions are good, but I am relying on my own strength and my own willpower to do some enormous "deed" that, even if I could pull it off, would serve far more to puff me up than to humble me and make me more teachable. My heart is not changed.

I would LIKE to make resolutions, sure. I really want to read more (I think 52 books in a year would be a pretty neat goal- one per week), and specifically I would like to read through the Bible, which I have never done. I tried it my freshman year in college and got bogged down in Ezekiel or somewhere. I would like to start volunteering my time and energy with the poor and the destitute. I would like to reestablish a clarity of purpose in my life towards which I can move and plan, and I would like to improve on my friendships and build community where I already have it. But I don't think these things will ever really happen unless they are accompanied by a change in my passions. We all do what we love doing.

Therefore my resolution this year is to learn to pray. One of the lessons I learned this past year is that if you love someone, you will yearn to spend time with them, talk to them, and get to know them better and better, day by day, deeper and deeper. It will pain you to be unfaithful to them in thought, word, or deed. If I love Jesus I will therefore want to "pray without ceasing," 1 Thessalonians 5:17. I am going to pray that God would change my heart. I really struggle sometimes because I feel like I have to pick myself up by my own bootstraps, but I can't. Only God can raise the dead. Only He can melt my hardened heart and turn it into repentant clay. Augustine once prayed in his Confessions, "I have no hope at all but in thy great mercy. Grant what thou commandest, and command what thou wilt." I am learning what it means to "call upon the name of the Lord," Romans 10:13. God commands things from us that He must grant to us -- this is one of the great mysteries of the Christian faith. I think a good first step is a humble reliance on Him through prayer, so that is where I think I'll start.

God bless if you made it this far... ! I just realized it is 3:30 in the morning. I should probably go to sleep. Thanks for soaking up my incoherencies. Owen

Romans 1:1-5

2007-09-27T17:22:00.000-07:00

"Paul, a bond-servant of Christ Jesus, called as an apostle, set apart for the gospel of God, which He promised beforehand through His prophets in the holy Scriptures, concerning His Son, who was born of a descendant of David according to the flesh, who was declared the Son of God with power by the resurrection from the dead, according to the Spirit of holiness, Jesus Christ our Lord, through whom we have received grace and apostleship to bring about the obedience of faith among all the Gentiles for His name's sake," --Romans 1:1-5

Thoughts:

-- Paul wrote Romans, but some dude named Tertius actually "wrote" it (Romans 16:22). My Bible's little introduction-to-Romans section says that Romans was probably written after First and Second Corinthians. That is interesting to note, because it means he would have been on his third missionary journey.
-- Paul is a bond-servant of Christ Jesus. This is an intersting phrase: should we ALL be bond-servants of Christ Jesus? This same word is used to describe Moses in Exodus 14:31, and to describe David in the title of Psalm 18. Is this a special commission from the Lord, or is it the state of every believer? I tend to think we ought all to have this disposition: we are all slaves to something, according to Romans 6:15-19. Or, check out Galatians 1:10.
-- Paul is called as an apostle. This is NOT a general calling: we are not all to be apostles (Ephesians 4:11). But we ARE commanded to "walk in a manner worthy of the calling with which you have been called," (Ephesians 4:1). I feel like I could really go deep into Ephesians 4 here, but that will have to wait for another day. A question I do have: what is an apostle?? What does it mean for Paul to say that? Check out 1 Corinthians 9:1-2 and following.
-- The term "gospel of God" is also used in these places.
-- The gospel was promised beforehand through the prophets in the Scriptures. It would be interesting to read through the Old Testament looking for promises of the gospel to come! I think, for example, that Isaiah 59:15-17 is fascinating in this light, because it prophesies that God Himself would accomplish righteousness for His people. Jesus was not just a great man, He was (and is: Revelation 1:17-18) God!
-- Christ was born of a descendant of David according to the flesh. This is important because of Jeremiah 23:5-6, but also because of Psalm 110 (check out Acts 2:29-36). I may have more thoughts on this later, as it relates to replacement theology.
-- Christ's resurrection from the dead "declares" Him to be the Son of God. Interesting.
-- His resurrection (or is it the declaration? it might be good to check the Greek grammar here) is according to the "Spirit of holiness." I can't find this phrase anywhere else in the Bible. When the Bible uses the word "Spirit" does it ALWAYS mean a personal spirit? Or can it mean a "general aura" of holiness, or an "atmosphere" of holiness, or some other such thing?
-- Paul received (1) grace and (2) apostleship. These things are GIVEN -- look again at Ephesians 4:11 -- which means that we cannot cook up grace on our own. Or apostleship, for that matter. Once again, I think that one of these things is to be common in the life of every believer (grace), and the other is Paul's personal calling (apostleship). We should be encouraged that every person has gifts from the Lord: He gives it all, which means that what you have been given is a gift specific to your needs and abilities in the Lord. Use what God has given you to win the lost and to unify the Church!!
-- The reason Paul receives these things is in order to bring about the "obedience of faith among all the Gentiles for His name's sake." There is a ton of information here. I would first note that God gives Paul these things to an end: they are meant to achieve a goal:
(a) to bring about the "obedience of faith." Works must accompany faith if it is faith at all (James 2:14, John 14:15). There is an obedience which corresponds to having faith.
(b) to do this "among all the gentiles." Paul was primarily an apostle to Gentiles whereas Peter was primarily an apostle to the Jews (Galatians 2:1-10). God wants the gospel to go into all the world: "Go therefore and make disciples of all the nations," Matthew 28:19. I think the word "among" is interesting here when coupled with "all". These two words indicate, simultaneously, that salvation will not come to every gentile (it will come AMONG all of them), and that salvation will come to every tribe and nation of gentiles (it will come among ALL of them). What power there is in the Word of God!!
(c) to do this "for His name's sake." The purpose of Paul receiving grace and apostleship, and the purpose of God saving some to Himself from among all the gentiles, is that His name be given glory. It is all for the sake of His name: for his reputation among the men and women of the world that we live in.

There is a lot in these first five verses that I haven't even touched, but I think this is enough to suit my purposes. I'm not writing a Bible commentary! But I do want to continue to use this space to work through the scriptures on a regular basis. If you read all my ramblings, congratulations, and I hope the time you spent here was edifying! Owen

Romans

2007-09-27T15:29:00.000-07:00

I decided that I want to start memorizing Romans.

Crazy? Maybe. Should I start with something easier? Maybe. But I think I need to start really digging into the Word, and Romans as a book has influenced me more than any other in my life. When I was in High School I met every Sunday after church with a small group of friends, where we carefully went through the Word. I am not quite sure how long this lasted (about two years?) but by the end we had covered Romans and both Corinthian books in depth, along with some other books, I think. It was at this time that I had my first real accountability to fellow believers, and when I first began to really understand and formulate my own faith. Words like "righteousness" and "justification," for the first time, actually MEANT something: they were no longer fill-in-the-blank lyrics for sappy worship songs.

Memorizing scripture is vital to our Christian faith, but in the last several years I have been guilty of laziness in this area. Psalm 1:2 has not accurately described me. Consider the following:

Joshua 1:8, "This book of the law shall not depart from your mouth, but you shall meditate on it day and night, so that you may be careful to do according to all that is written in it; for then you will make your way prosperous, and then you will have success."

Psalm 119:9-11, "How can a young man keep his way pure? By keeping it according to Your word. With all my heart I have sought You; Do not led me wander from Your commandments. Your word I have treasured in my heart, That I may not sin against You."

John 14:26, "But the Helper, the Holy Spirit, whom the Father will send in My name, He will teach you all things, and bring to your remembrance all that I said to you." (This may be referring to the apostles being able to remember the words of Christ so they could compose scripture, but God's spirit DEFINITELY brings scripture to our rememberance in our daily lives, too.)

I think I am going to use this medium as a way to help me as I work through the text bit-by-bit. I will probably post my thoughts on the passage I memorize, and I'll try to include cross-references that I come across, or questions that I have. If you read this feel free to let me know your thoughts on the text, or on my comments.

America?

2007-09-18T15:18:00.000-07:00

And thus I aspired to preach the gospel, not where Christ was already named, so that I would not build on another man's foundation; but as it is written, "they who had no news of Him shall see, and they who have not heard shall understand." --Romans 15:20-21

John Piper on this verse:

He is just passionate to get out of America. He is just passionate to get out of here. Where it has not already been named, "lest I build on someone else's foundation." Is there anybody in this room with that passion? "I don't want to build on my predecessor, I don't want to go to a church that is established! Give me a totally pagan people, give me a people that don't want me to come! Oh God, grant me to do what Paul did." If there is nobody like that in this room we may as well fold up the shop of Christianity, because that job is not done.

More To Come...

2007-08-13T13:12:00.000-07:00

Why hello there!

This is my new blog, I will be using it to give some updates about my life, so that you can more easily keep in touch with me.

I am off to class. There will be more than this.

Owen